Dare to Take the Lead

Hi, this is Jiro.

Try to be active—not passive—in conversation.
For Japanese learners of English, that alone is already a practical and realistic goal.

Here’s why.

In any conversation, people take turns. Some turns are active—you take the initiative. Others are passive—you respond.

In a passive turn, you have to:

1. listen carefully and understand what the other person says
2. know several ways to respond
3. actually respond in real time

These are high hurdles for many Japanese learners:
① You don’t have enough exposure to naturally spoken English.
② It’s hard to learn how to respond just by reading.
③ You have few chances to actually speak.

Now compare this with an active turn.

In an active turn, you only have to say what you want to say.

To be active in conversation, you need a bit of courage to:

・interrupt (politely) with your comments or reactions
・keep the conversation going as if it were your turn
・ask questions instead of waiting to answer them
・use simple questions—any questions—to stay in control
・be a “bad” conversationalist for a while

Does that sound difficult?

Actually, here’s some reassuring news.

Fast turn-taking is something Japanese speakers are already very good at—perhaps among the best in the world.

Researchers have measured the pauses between speakers in conversations across languages.
The longest pauses were found in Danish: about 0.47 seconds.
English averages around 0.2 seconds.

And Japanese?

About 0.007 seconds—one of the fastest in the world.

If these figures are accurate, Japanese speakers are used to switching turns extremely quickly—far faster than English speakers.

In other words, you already have the instinct for rapid, dynamic conversation.
You just need to use it in English.

In short:
You may have been aiming too high.

A “good conversation”—where both people take turns equally—is a high bar.
That’s why you keep getting stuck.

Start lower.

Even a “bad” conversation—where you do most of the talking—is still a success.
And small successes lead to bigger ones.

So—dare to take the lead.

Am I aiming low enough, or still too high?
Any way、 good luck!